Each retrograde tends to have a unique way of whoopin’ that ass one way or another. If it’s not the lack of clarity in your communication and thoughts or stifling anxiety about your life, then it’s your electronic devices going haywire. If you are not familiar Mercury is the planet that governs thinking and communications, and during a retrograde it travels backwards making such things murky, to say the least. This last retrograde, in particular, presented some very unique challenges, as it forced me to consider my relationship to logic. Being that I am Capricorn with a Virgo rising logic is the standard for me, but I found myself feeling like a hostage in a cosmic “stick-up” robbed of my logical thought process. I was restless and reckless, disorganized and lethargic, I didn’t work out, I didn’t clean up, I drank a lot of wine and ordered a lot of Chinese food. The typical order and sequence of my minds infrastructure eluded me or should I say was alluding to me.
For astrology buffs it comes as no surprise that for this retrograde mercury traveled through the sign of Sagittarius, only shifting into Scorpio towards the end. I kept attempting to dissect my comatose rebellion, wondering if it was the spirit of self-sabotage, I then found myself trying to go on one of my signature “guilt trips” about productivity. This was quickly halted as my intuitive faculties had a different destination in mind with an endpoint I couldn’t see with my logical eye. The feeling I was getting could best be described as “still embrace” so I decided I would stay centered and focused on the present moment trusting that this funk would be over soon or later. ‘
As of December 6th, I am slowly yet surely finding myself feeling freer, clearer, lighter and the productivity that I was so desperately trying to muster up has ignited effortlessly. A lesson yes, this retrograde was critical because it has allowed me to redefine my relationship with my intuition and forced me to trust the process and remain in the present moment. Sometimes it’s better to identify the “flow” and where it is going before we try to redirect that energy altogether. I am a firm believer that true desires of the heart always manifest and the trick is having the knowledge of self to understand what is truly in one’s heart. In the words of the great Lao Ma (Xena: The Warrior Princess) ” To conquer others is to have power, to conquer yourself is to the know the way” and when you know the way you are never lost.